This is Bailey.

He likes long walks in the park, laser pointers, and beer breath.

One time, after a long night of drinking and playing Rock Band, I fell asleep on Adam and Angela’s couch. Bailey woke me up by licking me. On the mouth.

If only I could find a man who likes the smell of stale beer that much…

(For the record, the only reason he’s paying me any attention in this photo is because Adam was aiming the laser pointer at my chest.)